iThink: a christmas of lasts

There are so many things I have to bid farewell this Christmas. To wit, this is my last christmas as a

• student as I'll be graduating come April 09;
• boy as I think I'm about to turn into a man upon graduation;
• bum because I will need to look for a job that could make me well off
• stick because I'll force my body to gain more mass as fast as possible
• killjoy since I need to mingle with any kind of person for me to personally launch myself to the adult world

It's hard to say goodbye to things you've been used to especially when such things have personal attachments to yourself. For about twenty years, I have gone through the same cycle in life but next year, it's gonna be different no matter how refuse to accept the reality of the situation.

My Close-to-Worse Christmas

Speaking about this christmas season, I hate to mention that there's nothing really memorable I could sketch in my head to ponder with in my older years. Christmas season in the Philippines, as has been true and as has been attested by many Filipino expatriates, is considerably the most worth-keeping and most worth-waiting holiday in the year compared to some other race's celebration around the world.

But reminiscing my previous christmases, I'm afraid I'm quite disappointed to reveal how much of my expectations have failed to happen.

First thing, the weather hasn't been a friendly sunshine but it has been a gloomy downpour of rainshowers and a cold breeze of northeasterly wind. I wouldn't really mind the wind had the rains spared the day.

Second, Filipinos are accustomed to receiving aguinaldos [christmas gift in the form of a present or money] from their ninogs and ninangs [godparents] if not during Christmas but at least anytime around the season [from September to January 6]. Sadly, given the long Christmas celebration in the country, I haven't even heard a word of greeting from my godparents save my god mother in Alaminos Batangas who is a dear friend of my mother.

In addition, we have the tradition of doing house-to-house asking for aguinaldos on Christmas day much like trick or treating in the west. But then, only children not older than 12 or 13 have the liberty to do so as it is dauntingly embarassing for a teenager or older to be seen roaming around the neighborhood because it would look much like asking for alms unless you have a small kid you're accompanying as an excuse. Probably that's how it is for a boy who is about to embark officially in the adult world.

And so, instead of brooding over aguinaldos which might never come to my pockets, my siblings and I decided to spend Christmas by watching one of the featured movies in the Metro Manila Film Festival [MMFF], entitled "Ang Tanging Ina nyong Lahat" [roughly translated as Your Only Dear Mother], a film of "dramedy" [comedy + drama] in nature after beginning the day with a mass at our cathedral. It's quite a relief, though because I was able to let out a hearty laugh, at the same time freely allow a tear to fall from my sleep-deprived eyes. 

Going back home, as it has also been a custom, as far as I can recall, a relative or somebody close to the family is expected to come and visit us every 25th of December. Guess what? Not a single one came. Well, probably there might have been someone who came in the morning, but still if somewhat did, they would have informed me through text.

As a result, we are the ones who consumed all the food which were initially intended for visitors. You see, it's in the tradition of the Filipino race to be a lot merrier if somebody came to eat up what the host prepared even if it would mean that the family of the host would be deprived to have a taste of the best food they prepared. That is because it's a sign that somebody remembers you and came all the way from their place just to share the joy of the occasion with you. But then again, in our case, I felt nobody ever remembered to share their blessings with us by just coming to our place.

A Present for Myself

Thinking about this day worth-forgetting, I just bought myself presents which I always do every christmas. I bought two books entitled "madame Bovary" by Gustave Flaubert and "In the Presence of my Enemies" by Gracia Burnham as well as this years "Person of the Year" issue of TIME magazine.

I guess, these will only be the things memorable for this year's christmas day because I always make sure to write a simple history which gives me the idea when and where I purchased my books as well as how much it costed.

Now, I'm quite uncertain about how things will go in the coming new year. Still, my hopes are high for something memorable to come until this holiday season signal another year.

How about you? How did your Christmas go?